New Year's is Absurd!

A New Year, A New Absurdity, Old Absurdities Repeated… yadda yadda yadda. Resolutions, Celebrations, Congratulations… are all absurd, especially in relation to a man-made date/woman-made date. So, Go Celebrate, Go Absurd!

The following New Year’s quotes/statements are absurd and not-absurd, you choose!

“RESOLUTIONS COLON ZERO STOP PERIOD HOPES COLON ZERO STOP BECKETT”

(Samuel Beckett’s 1984 telegram to The Times)

 "The only way to spend New Year's Eve is either quietly with friends or in a brothel. Otherwise when the evening ends and people pair off, someone is bound to be left in tears." (W.H. Auden)

“First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you.”
(F. Scott Fitzgerald) 

“He who breaks a resolution is a weakling; He who makes one is a fool.”
(F.M. Knowles)

“May the New Year bring you courage to break your resolutions early. My own plan is to swear off every kind of virtue, so that I triumph even when I fall!”
(Aleister Crowley, Moonchild)

“I can’t go on, I’ll go on” (Samuel Beckett)

“New Year’s Day — now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.”
(Mark Twain)

“Out with the old, in with the new” is a fitting expression for a holiday that is based on vomiting.”
(Andy Borowitz)

“Every New Year is the direct descendant, isn’t it, of a long line of proven criminals?”
(Ogden Nash)

“Many people look forward to the New Year for a new start on old habits.”
(Unknown)

"New Year's is a harmless annual institution, of no particular use to anybody save as a scapegoat for promiscuous drunks, and friendly calls and humbug resolutions." (Mark Twain)

"Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account." (Oscar Wilde)

“Do you think that I count the days? There is only one day left, always starting over: it is given to us at dawn and taken away from us at dusk.”
(Jean-Paul Sartre)

"Yesterday, everybody smoked his last cigar, took his last drink and swore his last oath. Today, we are a pious and exemplary community. Thirty days from now, we shall have cast our reformation to the winds and gone to cutting our ancient shortcomings considerably shorter than ever." (Mark Twain)

“Nothing changes on New Year’s Day” (U2)

“The end is in the beginning and yet you go on” (Samuel Beckett)