Go Absurd

A New Year, A New Absurdity, Old Absurdities Repeated… yadda yadda yadda. Resolutions, Celebrations, Congratulations… are all absurd, especially in relation to a man-made date/woman-made date. So, Go Celebrate, Go Absurd! The following New Year’s quotes/statements are absurd and not-absurd, you choose! “RESOLUTIONS COLON ZERO STOP PERIOD HOPES COLON ZERO STOP BECKETT” (Samuel Beckett’s 1984 telegram to  The Times )  "The only way to spend New Year's Eve is either quietly with friends or in a brothel. Otherwise when the evening ends and people pair off, someone is bound to be left in tears." (W.H. Auden) “First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you.” (F. Scott Fitzgerald)   “He who breaks a resolution is a weakling; He who makes one is a fool.” (F.M. Knowles) “May the New Year bring you courage to break your resolutions early. My own plan is to swear off every kind of virtue, so that I triumph even when

Sponsor’s Message Dream of Nothing! Dream of Everything! Go Absurd! Opening Absurdity Free lunches are everywhere (if you steal them) ((and if you steel them, they’ll just go hard)) Quote of the Day “Absurdity is the ecstasy of intellectualism.” (Criss Jami,  Salomé: In Every Inch In Every Mile ) A Wise and Foolish Saying That Will Probably Never Be Said If it wasn’t for Martha, you’d be Arthur A Sometimes Cruel and Absurd World… A UK mother of three has spoken about being forced to live in a house full of damp and mould along with her concerns for her family’s health. "I have a 15-month-old son and I can't put him on the floor in case he picks the fungus up and eats it." “Even my own GP has told us we should get out as a matter of urgency and I've been in tears trying to get this sorted out." https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/inside-horror-home-leaves-mum-21098620 Book Title You Will Probably Never

"I am interested only in 'nonsense', only in that which makes no practical sense. I am interested in life only in its absurd manifestations" (Daniil Kharms) Daniil Kharms, born Daniil Ivanovich Luvachev, was a Russian writer who lived, saw, and championed everything absurd. Little known until after his death, it was only in the 1960's/1970's that his work came to attention in Russia (and to a lesser extent in the English world). Not surprisingly, Kharms was known for being eccentric, reportedly having more than 30 pseudonyms and purposefully developing  a "strange hiccup-snorting seizure that disconcerted the NKVD agents who interrogated him." ( https://www.theguardian.com/books/2007/dec/12/fiction ) .  Kharms was one of the founders of a group of avant-garde and subversive poets who called themselves OBERIU (The Association of Real Art). One of their public statements was Dada-like in its wording:  "Art is a cupboard...Poems aren&#

Sponsor’s Message Quitting? Persisting? GO ABSURD! Advertising Message Lease this space permanently for one million dollars! (for an unlikely return) Quote of the Day “The bounties of space, of infinite outwardness, were three: empty heroics, low comedy, and pointless death.” (Kurt Vonnegut, The Siren of Titan ) An Absurd World… A Mississippi family has had their internal security camera hacked and their 8-year old daughter taunted by an unknown offender. The camera, set-up in their daughters’ bedroom, all of a sudden started to play a rendition of Tiny Tim’s, Tiptoe through the Tulips , while the 8-year old girl was in the room alone. Soon a male voice was telling her that he was Santa Claus while encouraging her to destroy the bedroom. https://edition.cnn.com/2019/12/12/tech/ring-security-camera-hacker-harassed-girl-trnd/index.html A Wise and Foolish Saying That Will Probably Never Be Said The late bird catches the world   Book Titl

The following nonsense/absurd limericks come from the great Edward Lear and his book: The Book of Nonsense. Born in 1812, Lear was ahead of his time, seeing the excellent value (or non value) of nonsense and absurdity well before our 'postmodern' period. An illustrator, artist, musician, author, and poet, Lear loved to create. He is now most well known for his nonsense poems and limericks, including, The Owl and the Pussy-Cat. There was an Old Lady of Prague, Whose language was horribly vague; ⁠ When they said, "Are these caps?" ⁠ She answered, "Perhaps!" That oracular Lady of Prague. From The Book of Nonsense  (1887)  Edward Lear There was an Old Lady of Prague London: F. Warne & Co., page 100 There was an Old Man in a tree, Who was horribly bored by a bee; ⁠ When they said, "Does it buzz?" ⁠ He replied, "Yes, it does! It's a regular brute of a bee!" From The Book of Nonsense   (1887)  Edward Lear There

Sponsor’s Message Tired of Dying? Go Absurd! Opening Absurdity If making love was easy, everyone would do it and: Grabbing the bowels of destiny, she lit a cigarette in her mouth and farted Quote of the Day “Our intelligence sometimes gives us the courage to do foolish things” (La Rochefoucauld) An Absurd World… A man in Las Vegas was shocked to discover two pigeons with cowboy hats on their heads as he looked out his car window. One had a red hat and the other grey. At the time of writing, the culprit had not been found. https://www.nytimes.com/2019/12/10/us/pigeons-cowboy-hats-las-vegas.html An Absurd Saying That Will Probably Never Be Said… Three in the bag is worth two in the hand Book Title You Will Probably Never See… The Mouths of the Poor are Rich: An Inclusivity Study The Meaning of Life? Obviously, it is to work hard for a boss Something to Wear https://teespring.com/en-GB/wine-flows-through-me A St

Sponsor’s Message Buy One Go Absurd and Get Two Go Absurds Absolutely Free! ( for a limited time only) Opening Absurdity Painting two stones with one bird is like spending Christmas alone in the nude and It’s alright to cry, kittens have no feelings too Quote of the Day “I have no money, no resources, no hopes. I am the happiest man alive.” (Henry Miller)   Henry Miller, photographed by Carl Van Vechten, 1940 Jan. 22. Packaging/Labels You Will Most Likely Never See… This product is 100% free of human faeces! (well, 99% free) A Wise and Foolish Saying That Has Probably Been Said What brings you into life brings you out of life A Sometimes Cruel and Absurd World… A Filipino woman, who initially came to Australia as a tourist, has allegedly been kept as a SLAVE by a Sydney couple inside their home. At first the woman worked for the couple as a nanny before they allegedly took away her passport and kept her working inside the ho

Sponsor’s Message Over Trying? Go Absurd! Opening Absurdity Spending an Abstract Summer in Winter’s large purse at the vibrating shopping mall with millions of lives conscripted to ‘hit the ground running!’ Or ‘A penny for your thoughts?’ Quote of the Day “All great deeds and all great thoughts have a ridiculous beginning. Great works are often born on a street corner or in a restaurant's revolving door.” (Albert Camus)   An Absurd World… A 72-year old grandmother from the UK has been fired after just one day in her role as ‘Mother Christmas’ for apparently not being festive or theatrical enough. "I am upset and have lost a bit of confidence as I still don’t know what I’ve done wrong.” https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/mother-christmas-sacked-not-having-21045668 Lots of Bob… Mrs Bob liked to Bob with Bob especially on Bob A Wise and Foolish Saying That Will Probably Not Catch On… The biggest man in the world is

Sponsor’s Message Overwhelmed By Meaningless Meaning And Senseless Sense? Well Then, Embrace Nonsense, Covet The Absurd! Go Absurd! Opening Absurdity Frugality is wearing suspenders to work in the nude And If you want to have strong bones, wearing a doctor’s cape is necessary Quote of the Day “How sublime to waste a life that could have been useful, never to execute a work of art that was certain to be beautiful, to abandon midway a sure road to victory!” (Fernando Pessoa) An Absurd World… Australia and New Zealand are the only countries where it is illegal for an adult not to wear a helmet when riding a bike. Prevented from making a perfectly reasonable decision about their own bodies and lives that the rest of the world can make. And the citizens of these countries are apparently ‘free’? Is the next step to wear a helmet for every physical activity ‘just in case’? A Wise and Foolish Saying That Will Probably Never Be Said Wherever there’s a