Go Absurd

Sponsor’s Message This Sponsor is Starving! Go Absurd! Opening Absurdity Mr Sally says it does do do do! DO? Like a fearless leader with no pants on… Mrs Sally says do Quote of the Day “Whether out of inadvertence or incompetence, he who however briefly halts humanity on its march is humanity’s benefactor.” (Emil Cioran)   An Absurd World… A woman in Utah is facing jail time and the possibility of being placed on the sex offender’s register for ten years after committing the heinous crime of going topless inside her own house while her traumatized step children looked on in horror https://www.nytimes.com/2020/01/22/us/tilli-buchanan-topless-utah.html Something to Wear   https://teespring.com/en-GB/don-t-as-i-do A Wise and Foolish Saying That Will Probably Never Be Said You know what they always say, appreciate the latter while enjoying the former Book Title You Will Probably Never See… A Metaphorical Academic Review...

Sponsor’s Message Wasting Time or Time Wasting You or Neither or Both? Go Absurd! Opening Absurdity There’s a man in the hills with a shaved vagina Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo Come to the hills for a lonely stranger Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo (to be sung to the tune of The Lonely Goatherd ) Quote of the Day “Have you ever heard a blindfolded octopus unwrap a cellophane-covered bathtub?” (Norton Juster,  The Phantom Tollbooth )   A Saying That Will Probably Never Be Said “Life is Like a Good Porno: Real” A Cruel and Absurd World… An Australian man has taken his own life just a day after video footage emerged showing him confronting a group of drag queens who were reading to children at a library. The man was the president of the politically Right group, the UQ Liberal National Club , who staged the protest and were seen chanting “drag queens are not for kids” as they confronted the drag queens at the family event. Predictably...

I. THAT OF MR. JUSTICE DEAR. "'Tis really very,  very  queer!" Ejaculated Justice Dear, "That, day by day, I'm sitting here Without a single 'case.' This is the twenty-second pair Of white kid gloves, I do declare, I've had this month. I can  not  wear White kids at such a pace." His Lordship thought the matter o'er. "Crimes ne'er have been so few before; Not long ago, I heard a score Of charges every day; And now—dear me! how  can  it be?— And, pondering thus, went home to tea. (He lives Bayswater way.) A frugal mind has Justice Dear (Indeed, I've heard folks call him "near"), And, caring naught for jibe or jeer, He rides home on a bus. It singularly came to pass, This  day, he chanced to ride, alas! Beside two of the burglar class; And one addressed him thus: "We knows yer, Mr. Justice Dear, You've often giv' us 'time'—d'ye he...

Sponsor’s Message Absurdity is Freedom, Freedom is Absurd. GO ABSURD! Opening Absurdity “The best things in life are free” (when you have paid a lot of money for them) Quote of the Day “To suffer is the great modality of taking the world seriously” (Emil Cioran) An Absurd World: Flashback to Medieval Times Medieval Deaths: William Scrym, died 1382, fell from a tree attempting to overthrow a nest of magpies. Robert of Rushton, imprisoned for errors in his account, died in prison of hunger and cold in 1323 Henry Debordesle, died 1343, long sick with diseases, smote himself in the belly with a knife worth one penny A Wise and Foolish Saying That May Have Been Said Before you leave your room, make sure the world’s right for you Book Title You Will Probably Never See… What’s the Difference Between Midnight and Midnight Blue? And Other Urgent Questions An Unlikely Public Boast and Proclamation… “I just had a salty o...

O nce upon a time, a long while ago, there were four little people whose names were and they all thought they should like to see the world. So they bought a large boat to sail quite round the world by sea, and then they were to come back on the other side by land. The boat was painted blue with green spots, and the sail was yellow with red stripes; and when they set off, they only took a small Cat to steer and look after the boat, besides an elderly Quangle-Wangle, who had to cook dinner and make the tea; for which purposes they took a large kettle. For the first ten days they sailed on beautifully, and found plenty to eat, as there were lots of fish, and they only had to take them out of the sea with a long spoon, when the Quangle-Wangle instantly cooked them, and the Pussy-cat was fed with the bones, with which she expressed herself pleased on the whole, so that all the party were very happy. During the daytime, Violet chiefly occupied herself in putting salt-water...

Sponsor’s Message The following is to be sung very loudly: “Simon Says Swap Your Hands With Your Feet! Put Your Nose On Your Chin! Oops, I Didn’t Say GO ABSURD!” Opening Absurdity Too many broths spoil the cook But let’s substitute ‘burgers’ for ‘broths’ (if you happen to live in the 21 st century) Quote/Proverb of the Day “If the rich could hire other people to die for them, the poor could make a wonderful living” (Yiddish Proverb) An Absurd World… A pre-Christmas midnight balloon drop in an Australian shopping centre went horribly wrong when an over-excited crowd rushed towards the prize-filled balloons and created a stampede. This resulted in five people being taken to hospital and twelve shoppers needing medical attention at the scene. https://www.abc.net.au/news/2019-12-24/westfield-parramatta-christmas-shopping-crush/11824942 A Wise and Foolish Saying That May Have Been Said… The surest way to get dirty is to clean Book Title ...